Internal Family Systems: the parts you might recognize
You might recognize some of these parts in yourself. None of them are the enemy.
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The inner critic, who keeps score so no one else can.
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The perfectionist, who believes flawless equals safe.
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The peacekeeper, who says yes so no one gets mad.
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The one carrying the shame that was never yours to carry.
In IFS, we get to know these parts with curiosity instead of judgment, understanding what they’re trying to protect and creating more space to respond from a place of choice.
What parts work looks like
1
We notice a part
Maybe it’s the inner critic that pipes up in a meeting, the part that wants to keep everyone happy, or the knot in your stomach before you say no. We slow down and notice what’s happening without judging or trying to make the part go away.
2
We get curious, not judgmental
We explore what the part is feeling, what it’s afraid might happen, and what it’s trying to protect. Parts often take on protective roles based on what we’ve experienced. Understanding their intentions can change the way you relate to yourself.
3
We connect with Self
Rather than fighting, silencing, or trying to get rid of your parts, we create space for Self to become more present and lead. In IFS, Self is the calm, curious, compassionate core of who you are, with qualities like clarity, confidence, courage, and connectedness. From this place, you can approach your parts with compassion while remaining grounded and able to choose how you respond.
4
We help parts release what they’ve been carrying
When there is enough safety and readiness, we may explore the painful beliefs, emotions, or experiences that some parts have been carrying. With the protective system’s trust and permission, parts can begin to release burdens that no longer belong to them and move toward more balanced roles.
Healing is not linear, and we honor the pace of your whole system throughout the process.
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Nothing about you is broken. Some parts of you have simply been working hard to protect you.
IFS-informed parts work is one of the approaches I may draw from in our work together, depending on what you need. In a free 15-minute consultation, we can talk about what’s bringing you to therapy and whether working together feels like a good fit.
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